Orphaned

Apologies for the radio silence, but my mom died suddenly about a month ago. She had a massive brain bleed and was in the ICU and hospice for 11 days. The whole experience has been a nightmare, even with my mom having most of her affairs in order, including having advanced directives.

This is my PSA: Make sure you and all of your loved ones have advanced directives. Decide what your wishes are for the end of your life and your funeral and tell your loved ones. Ask your loved ones what their wishes are. It will make a terrible time in your life ever so slightly easier if you (and other family members) find yourself in a situation in which you have to decide whether your loved one should live or die.

Now I’ve lost both parents in a somewhat sudden manner. My dad died in his sleep, and my mom died within a week and a half. I’m an orphan at 50. I remind myself that I should be lucky that my parents lived for as long as they did. Both of my parents lost a parent when they were teenagers. But my mom and I were very close, so I’m going to be struggling for a while.

There are many uncertainties in my life at the moment, but there is one thing I’m certain about: I will spend the rest of my life honoring Mom’s memory by attempting to live how she lived. With intention. With compassion. With thoughtful actions. With humor. With joy.