Fernando Friday

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“He who passively accepts evil is as much involved in it as he who helps to perpetrate it. He who accepts evil without protesting against it is really cooperating with it.”
—Martin Luther King Jr.
How many more people have to die senseless deaths in this country? The time for action is long overdue.
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MLK Day 2015

As MLK Day approaches, I feel mournful and ashamed—ashamed of my country. Almost 50 years have passed since MLK’s assassination, and we still haven’t grasped the concept that Black Lives Matter?

I can picture him sitting in heaven’s cafeteria with Mohandas Gandhi, Nelson Mandela, Susan B. Anthony, Frederick Douglass, etc. They are all shaking their heads and muttering to each other, “What the f***k are these people doing to each other?”

But from this shame rises a glimmer of hope. The hope that someday everyone will believe that everyone’s lives matter. OK, a lot of people will believe that everyone’s lives matter. I think that volunteering and being of service to others is a step in the right direction. When you help people who need help, you bear witness to their humanity, to your common humanity. When you just help, period, you are making an important difference and seeing the world through a different lens.

So take part in the MLK Day of Service if you have free time on Monday. Or volunteer at some other point during the month. Volunteermatch and Points of Light are good places to start looking for opportunities.

Here are some MLK quotes to kick you in the behind:

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”

“The time is always right to do what is right.”

“The ultimate tragedy is not the oppression and cruelty by the bad people but the silence over that by the good people.”

“We must build dikes of courage to hold back the flood of fear.”

Age Discrimination and Alphabet Bar Update

Firstly, Happy Veterans Day to the veterans out there, including my dad!

Secondly, I joined Match.com again, even though I swore I would never throw my money its way again. I was sucked in because I received a message about a week ago; I eventually broke down because I wanted to read the message.

It was a one-word message.

Yes, one word. Sadly, this is not the first one-word message I’ve received. Unless you’re Tarzan, you should have the decency to write a complete sentence.

Age and height discrimination is alive and well on Match. Almost all of the men I viewed were either looking for someone younger or taller than I am. I’m just incredulous. Even men my own age are not stooping to date someone who is the same age. Obviously these type of men are not worth my time, but it’s still shocking.

I hadn’t noticed the height discrimination before. Most of the men I viewed were looking for a woman 5’2″ or taller. Why not round down to 5’0″? Does a measly two inches really make a difference?? (I’m 5’1″.)

I cursed and grumbled as I blocked all of these men. Am I too easily offended? Single folks, would you contact these persnickety guys even if your age/physical requirements didn’t match what they were looking for?

Lastly, the alphabet bar update. Mary and I went to The Abbey, which is in our neighborhood. It’s dark and small and cozy = my favorite type of bar. Pumpkin beer was still on the menu, so I had a Cambridge Brewing Great Pumpkin Ale. SO good.

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I’m 1/3 of the way through the list now…many more bars to come!

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Media Diet

 

I’m back from England. The trip was interesting and hysterical and eye-opening and even entailed some serious drama. That’s all for another post.

Just wanted to check in and say that I was incommunicado for the entire week I was away and loved every minute of it. I didn’t bother to upgrade my dumbphone to an international plan because my mom and brother have smartphones and therefore had access to a free texting app. I attempted to check my email, but Microsoft’s security level proved to be pretty high. In order to log into my account, I needed to have a code texted to my phone. No phone = no email.

I had 689 emails waiting for me upon my return. Of those 689, I only cared to read 124 of them.

I knew I received a lot of junk email, but wow. That is A LOT of junk email. I am going to unsubscribe to a number of lists. And I’m also going to make a conscious effort to spend less time surfing around online. If I used social media, I would cut back on that too. Want to go on a media diet with me?

 

Courtesy of intentblog.com

Photo courtesy of intentblog.com

The Hellfire That Is “Romantic Jail”

 

I’ve been online dating off and on for about eight years now. I came across this article by Katie Heaney the other day and found it terribly funny and terribly depressing. I’d like to add a 7th category of message, under which most of the messages I receive fall. I would call it something like “Least Amount of Effort Possible” or “I Didn’t Even Glance at Your Profile for a Millisecond” or “Your Cat Could Write a Longer Message.” The majority of the messages that I receive are one sentence long. And they usually read “Hi, how are you?” or “How is your weekend going?” The prize for minimal effort goes to the guy who sent just one word, “cute.”

Online daters, what is the worst/funniest message that you’ve received?

My usual expression while surfing match.com (Courtesy of starttravelinglight.com)

My usual expression while surfing match.com
(Courtesy of starttravelinglight.com)

 

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